This past weekend was my birthday. I spent time reflecting—over the last year, the previous two years, three years, etcetera. It was also an opportunity to think about the future. Each year, each birthday, a memory, a realization that time passes quickly.

Twenty-three years ago, when we exchanged vows, I was naive and didn’t understand the unique challenges of the military lifestyle. I also couldn’t imagine all the opportunities and adventures. Frequent moves, 23% unemployment, and underemployment are real barriers for military spouses. There have been a lot of tears, laughter, stress, and anxiety, but I know this isn’t restricted to military families. Our lifestyle as a veteran spouse and friend referred to it as “Semper Gumby”—“Always Flexible.”

In another article, I shared about our Loss as a Military Family. I didn’t mention the lost time in the article. Time spent apart from each other or away from family. There were lost celebrations: weddings, graduations, anniversaries, and births. A clear path to a steady career was like finding a needle in a haystack. In early 2021, my husband received orders to NATO in Belgium… where I stayed until November 2023. The journey had been a career struggle, especially evident during our time in Belgium. The unemployment rate of military spouses in 2023 was 22%. Yet, those challenges built my resilience, pushing me to give back.

On the upside, I have met some amazing military families who have done great things for the military community. I was part of an organization and group that pushed for military spouse residency rights. That bill was signed into law in 2009. I created a coalition to champion the Military Spouses Residency Relief Act (MSRRA), with my testimony letter featured in a Senate Committee on Veterans’ Affairs hearing. I stepped out of my comfort zone and not only spoke up but also connected with local officials in support of that bill.

This birthday also brought reflections on the traditions that kept us grounded through 15 moves. We’ve built small rituals to stay connected despite deployments and TDYs. Each morning, my husband says, “Good Morning, Sunshine!” and kisses me goodbye before work, a habit born after his flight school training accident when I feared a missed kiss. For birthdays, I bake a cake from scratch and cook a favorite meal, a tradition that holds even overseas. These moments remind me that, despite lost time, we’ve woven love and stability into our military life.

I picked up so many unique skills: domestic engineer, home renovator, project manager extraordinary, lawn girl, and expert volunteer, to name a few. As an AmeriCorps member with the Navy-Marine Corps Relief Society, I taught financial education to service members and veterans. Volunteering shaped my career… turned passion into a paycheck. These roles fuel my Homefront Hustle, mentoring spouses to build careers despite moves, and now guide my next chapter.

Our time is winding down as a military family. It is amazing to think that in ten months my husband will be retired. Ten months from retirement, it’s a rollercoaster! We’re navigating TAP, SkillBridge snags, and admin hurdles. A new journey awaits us, and I’m excited to take my business into the next adventure. What reflections or milestones have shaped your path, military or not? Share your story.

Originally published on LinkedIn on July 28, 2025. [Read it here]